The First Week

Ella is so small, that the newborn clothes drown her.  Her arms come out of everything and make her look limbless.  I have tried on all of her headbands, and they all fall right off her.

We decided to try Elder Ballard’s challenge of reading the Book of Mormon by the Fourth of July.  I’m not sure of the exact dates and challenge, but that’s our cut off date.  Cole and Seth read along, and we stop and discuss, rather than reading just to read.  Luke and Brooke mess around and get in trouble at least 10 times.  I pass the baby off to the most obedient child, so that’s a good incentive for now.

I wanted to get a hand picture when Ella is so teeny tiny.  It was a challenge on all levels.  The second picture is of my Mom’s hand on the bottom, then my hand, then Sugar’s hand with ink smack dab in the middle of it, then Ella’s uncooperative hand.

I nurse on demand.  I feel like I am sitting, feeding the baby all the time—because I am.   She eats non-stop at night, and I have to sleep next to her, or she cries.  I’m always nervous co-sleeping in the beginning, but then we get into a groove, and I am such a light sleeper that I know I wont roll over on her. 

Cole is a baby whisperer.  He will hold her for very long periods of time.  He makes me nervous by walking around with her, then asking me:  “Mom, are you learning to trust me because I can walk around with her and not drop her?”  No, dear, I am not.

Seth has an obsession with feeling the soft spot on her head, so I limit his time holding her.  Luke is actually just perfect with her.  He likes to hold her for about 30 seconds, tell her over and over that “I your bih budder now!” and kiss her about 100 times.  Then he hands her back.

A few other things that have developed this week:
Luke can feed himself cereal.  He then will proceed to tell anyone within shouting distance the order in which he got the bowl, spoon, milk and cereal.  He is very proud of himself.  He pours way too much cereal and milk, only eats about 10 bites, but the point to focus on here is that he is feeding himself!

I am having showings of this house every day.  I had to limit it to once a day.  It’s a giant hassle.  I get at least 10 calls a day from agents, and they are pushy.  Even my “I have a newborn” card falls on deaf ears.  So we’ve been going to the park, A LOT.  I’ve sat in the backyard during a mega showing, and they all wanted to come back and ask me questions, to which I don’t have any answers, so I have to leave.  Everyday Luke asks me which park we are going to.  Not such a bad thing, but not the nap I need in the middle of the day.

Wolf and Webelos Achievements

Seth finally was awarded his Wolf in Cub Scouts.  I say finally because here we are in the end of February, and he had it completed in November.  There was a fiasco at the January Pack Meeting—they forgot to give him is award and he became very upset.  I wasn’t there, but my mom told me it wasn’t pretty.

I didn’t attend this Pack Meeting either, and I was very nervous that something might happen again to Seth.  Luckily, it all turned out.

It also happened to be the Blue and Gold Dinner, which is a big deal in Cub Scouts.  They had a cake decorating contest and here was our entry:

Kudos go to my Mom who directed the entire production.   The kids all felt cheated that at the Pack Meeting, there wasn’t any actual contest.  No awards for decorations were given.  I say false advertising. 
Here is Seth and his current best buddy Michael.  They are in the same class at school, too. 

Now that is a happy boy!  He got his Wolf, a gold arrow point and some silver ones, and is ready to be a Bear.

Cole earned his Webelos badge.  He has an AMAZING leader.  She is totally organized and gung ho.  Apparently, she has had this calling for 20 years, and told me that every single one of her Scouts has also received the Arrow of Light.  She has the boys over on Saturdays and holidays so they can earn all the pins.  Cole loves her and I do, too.  That’s her behind Cole. 

He is supposed to have a W on his face.  Artistic License, is what is going on here.  Cole looked in the mirror, sighed, and said:  “My guy didn’t do such a good job painting me.”

When the kids came home, my Mom and Shawn both insisted on getting this picture.  I was not happy to be photographed at the time, but I love this picture now. 

I love my Cub Scouts!  I am so thankful for the men and women who serve in this amazing program and all the wonderful  things it teaches boys.  It truly is a program that every boy ought to be involved in.  Scouts turn boys into men. 

Highs and Lows, February 26, 2012

LOWS:

Feeling pretty crappy and sick the first half of the week. 

Luke has bronchitis.

Bad insomnia and basic worry over housing, but mostly over the birth. 

Suddenly feeling so unprepared for everything.  I just want to tune it all out.

Having to be on call with Labor and Delivery starting Wednesday at midnight for the call to get induced.  I had my phone with me and once they called, I had an hour to get there or my spot was gone.  We live 30 minutes away, so I had to plan carefully what I did. 

I didn't sleep for 36 hours straight, from waking up at 5:00 am Wednesday morning with insomnia, to giving birth and nurses coming and going. 

HIGHS:

I got the call to come in for induction Thursday night at 9:58. 

The birth.  What a piece of cake.  My OB looked at me and said:  "You could have done this on your own.  I should have stayed in bed."

GIRL!!!  GIRL!!!  GIRL!!!!  The ultrasound was right!  First thing I said once she was out:  "Double check she's a girl!"

My Mom is in town taking care of us.  I can tell she's already worn out, and I feel bad, but I really need her!  She is very loving to come and stay with our chaos.

I love my baby.

Shawn has told me about 10 times how happy he is with our family, that we are so blessed, that I am a great Mom, he is thankful to be married me, he loves me....great stuff.  I think we are all euphoric.

Looking at the baby is so fun.  I always forget how incredibly tiny they are. 

I love the way she smells.

The kids love their baby sister.  Can't hold her enough.  Luke is very soft and tender with her, but he is very sick, so I have to limit his interaction.

I love my baby.  I love my baby.  I love my baby.  I love my baby.  I love my baby.

I'm done being pregnant FOREVER!!!!!!

The Little Guy Ain’t So Little Anymore

It’s always amazing to me how big the youngest child seems when I bring a new baby home.  My littlest munchkin is suddenly this huge creature. 

Can we all just laugh as we notice that Luke has his hands in his pants?  Don’t get offended—if you have little boys you know how they are.  He also has a raspberry Crystal Light mustache—I wont be offended when you tell me me what a bad mother I am to put him to bed without brushing his teeth or washing his face.  You know how some days are like that.

No wonder I feel cramped whenever Luke climbs in bed with me.  He looks like a giant!
After the first camera flash, Luke woke up, but very groggy.  He wasn’t sure what was going on.  He kept saying:  “Is tat oo, baby?”

And then he went in for the kiss, and then the looooooooong kiss.  Can’t get enough of his baby sister.

He doesn’t care that she’s jaundiced and yellow, and she doesn’t notice that he has a juice mustache.  A match made in heaven.

Baby Ella

This birth was easy-peasy lemon-squeazy.  Maybe all 5th child births are like this, but I secretly know it’s the cocktail of Pitocin and an Epidural that give me quick and painless-- with the exception of the dreaded IV--birth. 

Having to wait for a call that  can come at any time of day or night is stressful.  I was on call with the hospital to be induced. I decided to call them every 4 or so hours to get an update.  I can be obnoxious like that. The best they could tell me was “Id give you a 70% chance of being called in late tonight.”  Anticipation and anxiety!

The call came at 9:58 pm just as I sat down to eat a bagel.  Suddenly my appetite was gone!   We had 1 hour to get there or my spot would be given away. 

By 11:45 I had the iv in—took her 10 minutes!!  OUCH.  Soon after the anesthesiologist came in.  I kept getting Charlie horse type sciatica, so that took 20 minutes.  Then I was given this giant yellow peanut to put under one leg and told to sleep.  Yeah, right! 

Here I am thinking thoughts of an easy delivery.  Shawn was snoring away.  Glad someone was sleeping.

By 2:45 I called the nurse and told her I felt pressure.  She could see the head, and called my doctor.  20 minutes later he was there.

Once they got me in position, my OB says “Tell me when you want to give birth—you got me outta bed, so lets do something here.”  I told Shawn to get the camera ready, and just then Shawn says:  “Whoa!!  Her head is already out?” 

This picture is of me asking—did you get ANY pictures???  He got 1.  She was born at 3:31 am.  My OB’s next statement was:  “Why did you wake me up for this?  You could have done this without me.”  Can I get a cut rate on your fee, then?

7 pounds even.  Seriously?  My smallest baby by far.  And I was the biggest by far, which tells me my belly was 90% fat.  I honestly thought she would weigh 8.8.

Happy as can be—it’s over, it was easy, she really was a she!  I had been awake since 5:00 am—22 hours.  Not a fan of night deliveries.

I have a lot of wrinkles on my forehead.  This is an angle I don’t usually see myself from.   At least my gray hair is gone!!

Shawn watched over the baby while they did the testing and cleaning, then held her while I devoured anything not nailed down.  Giving birth makes me ravenous!

It took 3 days to name her.  I took turns calling her Bria (my favorite) and Ella (Shawn’s favorite).  I was sad that Bria just didn’t fit her.  Then Shawn said he wasn’t sure about Ella.  He started throwing out names like Orange, Free, Soda or Stream.  For the love!  Then he started in with Cosette.  She was almost Cosette, but I just felt like Ella was her name.  So Ella Christine—after my sister Chrissy—she is.  A delicate, girly name for a delicate girl. 

Man, I can’t believe how tiny she is!  How does this always come as a surprise to me? 

Oh, and she smells divine.

First Bath and Visitors

I was really surprised that Ella received a real bath in the hospital.  A nurse came in to do her footprints and some tests, then gave her a bath in the sink.  My other babies were always cleaned off in the delivery room and that was it.  This nurse put two large towels in the sink, filled it up a bit and put the baby in.  I was a tad nervous, as I have always been the one in charge of my new babies near water, and my right leg was still asleep, so I couldn’t get out of bed if I had to.

Ella was happy as a clam.  I really liked the method of washing her hair.  My babies always cry at bath time when it’s hair washing time, so I think I”ll be using this new technique.

Around 9:00 am my Mom brought the kids over. They didn’t know I left that night to have the baby, as they were all in bed.  Their excitement level was pretty high upon waking up and finding out I was in the hospital and that they were going to miss school in order to go to the hospital to see her!
Shawn calls this picture “Girl Power”. 

I heard Luke out in the hallway asking:  “Is THIS Mom’s room?  Baby came out NOW?”  He came in all smiles and grabbing for baby.  Then everyone else took their turn.  I love how people—old and young—hold brand new babies:  as close to their face as possible.  It’s almost as if we all try to breathe in some of that newness. 

The one of Cole and Luke peeking down on the baby is my favorite.  They were all enthralled and couldn’t get enough. 

It was better than Christmas!  Grandma finally had her turn.

You want to know where the kids get their fake smiles from?  Check out Shawn.  And it looks like I have man-hands.  The better to hold a baby with, right?

This looks like she’s already a modern-girl with crazy ear phone type things on.  This was her hearing test.  

The hospital seemed to be filled with more crazy nurses than usual.  The first one was appalled by my latch.  I had to tell her I’ve had 4 other children, who were all very fat babies, and that they all have trouble latching in the hospital, but I know what I am doing.  Oh, no, that would not do, so she called in the Lactation Consultant.  These ladies are all, uh, interesting.  She had me demonstrate, and then proclaimed that I breastfeed “Old School” and showed me a new method that requires the football hold, of which I am no fan.  Two other nurses seriously freaked out that I was nursing in bed and might fall asleep.  But the best one was the diaper change after my mom had put some Desitin on the baby.   The nurse opened the diaper and gasped:  “IS THIS POWDER???”  She then told me how powder is a huge SIDS contributor.  Then I had to sign a waiver that I had watched a 20 minute video on Shaken Baby Syndrome.   Holy Cow.  Either this hospital sees a lot of bad stuff, or I just got some very hyper OCD overly anxious type of Nurse for the day and a half that I was there.
My favorite part was that I could order as much food as I wanted, and I ordered 4 trays of food for all 3 meals my first day.  Of course, Shawn was there to help me chow down, but I had no problem cleaning my plates.  I wish I could order trays of food from my TV at home—who’s up for inventing that?
The one question I really wanted to find out from the Nurses was what ever happened to the screaming lady in the delivery room next to mine?  This poor woman screamed bloody murder for 30 minutes, cried, sobbed, screamed  “OUCH!  Ahhh, ahhh this hurts so bad!”   in between the screaming, and I just wanted her to get the epidural and save us all a lot of pain and misery.  But I never found out if she delivered soon, got the epidural or her husband clubbed her to shut her up—I guess I’ll never know.

Swimming in February

It doesn’t take much for the kids to want to get wet.  Not in the bathing, cleanliness sense of the word.  I’m talking water on their bodies.  Period.
In the desert, in the winter, it can get mighty cold.  But it can also be 73 degrees, which is apparently the temperature it needs to be for my kids to proclaim it a “Swimming Day”.
They didn’t technically go “swimming”, but they did get wet, in a pool and partially submerged certain appendages.  They also surfed.

Luke was the brave one who actually climbed in and waded on the top step. But this was as deep as anyone got today.  That pool water is COOOOOLD.

I will have to modify my claim that the kids swam in the pool in February.   In the desert in the winter, you sort of  splash and maybe, if you are really, really brave, you wade up to your knees.  Even though it was cold, it’s still a heck of a lot better than sitting on the couch, watching the same 3 episodes of “Good Luck Charlie” over and over again until Mommy has all the dialogue memorized.

He really, really likes his peas

Thank goodness for having ONE child who likes fruits and vegetables.  That one child is Luke, and let me tell you, he loves them all.  Especially pears, pineapples and peas.  It must be a “P” thing.
  The other night we had corn on the cob, crash potatoes, salmon and peas.  Luke inhaled the corn, poked at the fish, ate most of the potatoes, and then grabbed the bowl of peas on the table, plunked himself on the floor and shoveled the peas in his mouth as fast as he could.  I really enjoyed watching him use the big serving spoon.  At least I’ll have one healthy child, when the others all turn into “WALL-E” type people from all the garbage they’ve been consuming while I ignore them and let them forage for themselves on stale marshmallows, saltines and go-gurts.

Highs and Lows February 19, 2012

LOWS:

I didn't get Shawn anything for Valentine's Day--as we discussed--but he bought me a bouquet of roses.  I feel like a shlup.

I went to all three Valentine's parties at school, even though they were staggered throughout the day.  I didn't really need to be there--I was the only parent.  Luke had no nap, and pretty much ran around each classroom stealing cupcakes and candy off of desks.  The whole day gave me a headache, plus we visited Shawn's work party, which was just too much for me.

Started getting a cold earlier this week, so on top of the other physical complaints, I can add sinus pressure and congestion that keeps me awake and unable to breath through my nose.

Found out that the house we are in is going into foreclosure and the landlord wants us out in 30 days.  WHAT???  We are working on options to extend it, but it's not looking too pretty.  This is exactly what every woman who is going to have a baby in a about a week wants to hear.  At this point, moving to an apartment may be a reality.  Who wants my life?

I have looked at some rentals that were beyond frightening.  There is so little out there in the areas we want to be.  Just...nothing is available. I'm not looking for high end.  I need functional and not a prior crack house. Desperation is not a place you want to visit.

Had my membranes stripped at my 38 week appointment.  I felt like with having to move, it would be better to kick the kid out sooner, rather than later.  It was intense, and I was totally confident it would work, since that's how I went into labor with Cole and Seth.  After 2 days of misery, cramping, nausea and other sure signs that it was going to work, it didn't.  My mom and sister drove out on Friday thinking FOR SURE I would have this baby....and I didn't.  They left today.

The dirt bags in Cole's class are now making constant sex jokes, homosexual nasty jokes and other things that 10 year olds should not have to deal with.  I am really considering homeschooling beginning in March.  He tells me he is okay, but do I really want him surrounded by this junk now?  Junior High will come soon enough.  Seriously, his class looks like rejects from California Youth Authority--or a meeting of Future Inmates of Arizona...scummy boys. 

Everything bad is happening right now and it pretty much sucks.  I'm thinking something is going to happen to the baby, because that would fit in with the scenario of crappy stuff piling on.  Did I mention Shawn is going crazy at work with the remodel and unhappy patients?  Or crazy delusional patients walking out in hospital robes and trying to hitchhike to a casino?  Yeah, he has a job that provides crazy stories--and a lot of stress.

Stress, anxiety, gnawing worry...anyone surprised?

HIGHS:

The Romney Rally was really fun.  The kids loved it.

The OB told me that my induction date is either this coming Thursday or Friday, so I have an end date, and that is so psychologically satisfying. 

I've convinced Shawn that we either need to buy a house in this one specific area of Gilbert that  I want, or move back to Phoenix. 

Died my hair.  It's too dark, but boy, do I love not seeing any gray hair.

Cole and I got all culinary tonight and made Apple/Bacon Grilled Cheese Sandwiches with caramelized onion mayo.  They were awesome!  But very heavy, so I'm not feeling too great.  And we probably have bad breath, so it's good I don't have to breathe on any of you.

Today is my last Sunday to ever be pregnant in my entire life.  That's a pretty good feeling.

A Day in the Life

One blog that I read regularly has a component called “The 12 for 12” project—or something like that.  On the 12th of every month, you must post 12 pictures of things you did that day.  Her 12 for 12  has this great template, you can see it here...  I even asked her once to send me the template, which she kindly did, but my computer wasn’t compatible, so I gave up.

But I decided I liked this kind of documentation so much, so I was going to do it my own way.  Her snapshots always look like her day is filled with fun, busy things.  As I took pictures of my day today, I realized that my pictures aren’t exciting in the least.  But it is a true snippet of a typical day for me, and what with big changes happening any day now, I may come back to this day with some nostalgia….really soon, too!

1.  My day started at 7:20.  That’s when Shawn turned on the bathroom light, and it shines directly onto the bed.  It’s dark outside at 7:00 am.
2.  Cole has started waking up before everyone else, getting dressed head to toe, eating breakfast, brushing his teeth, packing his backpack and then coming and reporting to me.  His goal is to get on the computer, and when he does all this, he has earned computer time before school.  I am loving that he does this right now.

3.  Luke sleeps on our floor every night.  When he wakes up in the morning, he climbs into bed and insists on laying on my arm and snuggling into my neck.  I love it, but I don’t love it when Sugar comes in and they fight over me.  I have to have equal cuddle time for each one, and they pout when it isn’t their turn.  Plus, last night I barely slept with contractions and cramping, which turned into nothing but annoyance.
4.  After I dropped off the kids at school (they were on time!), Luke and I did a Target run.  I bought pull ups for him, newborn diapers, pajamas for me to wear home from the hospital and bananas.

5.  One thing I’ve really wanted to do before the baby comes is to color my hair.  I decided I had better start coloring my own again, since going to a salon for 2-3 hours in the next year wont be very possible.  I went way too dark…like Morticia Adams dark.  Every person has asked me:  “What did you do to your hair today?”  I’m having coloring regret.
6.  Just as I was about to get in the shower to wash it out, the cleaning ladies showed up.  I LOVE having them, but they show up different times and days every week.  Communication is poor, and even though I think they leave every week with a set date and time for next week, I truly don’t know when they will show up.  Lost out on a desperately needed nap today.

7.  The kids had Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal for dinner tonight.  Ever since I had my membranes stripped yesterday I have been feeling crampy and nauseous.  I couldn’t pull  off any kind of dinnertonight.  No one complained.  They could all live indefinitely on sugar cereal.
8.  While they ate, I sat on the couch and watched “The O’Reilly Factor”.  I cursed myself for getting my membranes stripped, being so miserable, and not waiting for my induction date of next Thursday.  I am an idiot!

9.  The boys are in between books right now, so they are into Legos at bedtime.  I wish they would start an hour earlier, since they only really get into their games/stories when I come in to turn out the lights.
10.  Sugar and I cuddling in bed while she zooms through a Disney “I Spy” book.  I wish we could read for a solid 30 minutes, but with Shawn never home at bedtime, and Luke coming in and out, it’s a quick one book, hug and kiss type of thing.

11.  I did a ton of laundry today.  I feel very accomplished when I do a lot of whites, because then I know at least everyone will have clean underwear and socks, if nothing else.
12.  I finished my day around 10:30 making lunch for the kids for tomorrow.  I gave them turkey sandwiches today, so they get pb & j tomorrow.  My nausea went away and I ate the half of Sugar’s sandwich she never eats.